I read an article recently asking the question, "Do Women Have Themselves To Blame for Work-Family Imbalance?" It brought up several key points how we, women, put such high expectations on ourselves and therefore when we are not *perfect* and live up to those expectations than we deem ourselves as a failure in (insert whatever is at hand at the moment). And guilt. We have such GUILT about it. We are essentially our own worse enemy.
It is an interesting topic because it is similar to the premise of my blog (and confessional posts) and how it came about. I used to be one of those women that felt I had to be perfect at everything. Perfect wife, perfect mother, perfect employee, etc and then one day I woke up completly and utterly exhausted and said...say it with me here:
I Am Not Superwoman!
I can not be perfect at all things to all people. Heck, I can't even be semi perfect at all things for that matter.
Now don't get me wrong, just because I had this AHA moment, it does not mean I have become complacent by any means but rather I have come to grips that for me, perfection, is fleeting. I do the best that I can with what I have to work with. I have some good days, some bad days.
....My house is a mess but I got out of bed.
.........My kids are fed even if it is just cereal out of the box for breakfast.
...............My husband and I, we bicker but make up.
I am done (have been done) with perfection as the end all, be all of my existance. And you can be too! Just let it go. Enjoy your time with your imperfect family, in your messy house, driving your dirty car through the drive thru for dinner. It is not the end of the world if every dinner is not made from scratch. Shh, nobody will even know unless you tell them. But you have food, you have life. That is what matters!
Stop trying to keep up with The Jones'. Be the keeper of your life, your family, your GOD how it fits you. One size does not fit all. What works for me, might not work for you. What works for you, might not work for me.
Find that happy medium. Help support your family but don't kill yourself trying to do so, that is not going to help anybody. Give your all at work but turn off your brain from work when you step in your front door. Be present at home. Sit down with the kids, read them a book instead of cleaning the kitchen. Throw in a ready made lasagna for dinner so you can converse with your husband/wife instead of slaving over the stove.
And stop reading blogs of those that profess to be perfect! This only does more harm than good to your self esteem.
In closing, to answer the question, "Can We Really Have It All?" I think we can get pretty close to having it ALL (whatever all is in our own eyes) BUT we will probably have to lower our high expectations a little bit.
What do you think?
I am linking this post up to 6WS over at Showmyface.com. Did you figure out what my 6 words are?