Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Skid Marks

And not as in the car tire kind....

And not mine.

My 3 year olds.  The other day when getting said 3 year old ready to get into the bath I could not help but notice skid marks in his underpants. I know gross but I just had to share. 

Ohh and then to top it off he proceeded to go to the bathroom, while I was standing there.  Since when does ones peep peep (yes, that is what we call it) become a Fire Hose! 

Oh my goodness, he peed all over the place.  No wonder why our hall bathroom (which is the bathroom most guests use; sorry) smells like a urinal ALL THE TIME.  I clean and clean and clean it but what good is that when little man pees all over the seat, drips onto the floor, etc.  Guess, Daddy will have to reschool *abutt*  how to properly wipe and aim.  Yes, this is Daddy's job.  We school the same sex so it will be my turn again when Miss K gets to potty training. 


And so while we are on the subject of grossness, Miss K, ever since she started eating real people food for most of her feedings, she can clear a room with her business (I am not joking it is THAT bad).  And the leakage has become a huge issue.  Last week we went out to dinner and wouldn't you know the most inopportune time, Miss K has a BLOW OUT. And I am not talking any ordinary blow out. We are talking a whole thing of wipes, new outfit kind of blow out AT THE RESTAURANT.  We just actually sat down to start eating our dinner when we all started smelling something *funky* (I thought it was the Macaroni & Cheese Pizza** but it wasn't).  Almost simultaneously, we all turned and looked at Miss K knowing darn good and well that the funkiness was coming from her.

Exit stage left.  To the bathroom we went and the fun began. 

And today, having just left MIL house (with a clean diaper) I attempted to stop at the grocery store quick like on the way home.  We drove into the parking lot and drove right back out.  And home we went.  Another blow out.  Luckily,we only live 5 mins up the road from the store so it wasn't a huge inconvenience.  I figured it would be better to change the blow out at home then in the grocery store bathroom with the 3 yr old right under toe.  And we know how convenient and stable the public changing tables are.  You know the ones that fold down and wiggle like they are going to fall off the wall at any moment with your baby on it.

And while we are on the subject (still), as a mother going to the bathroom is something we never get to do on our own.  I honestly don't remember any time recently when I have gone to the bathroom without any child in the room or without interruption while at home.  I went to lunch with a girlfriend today, we shall call Shenahnah ( not her real name; to protect the innocent of course) and we had a conversation about this.  I shared with her my adventure the other day while *attempting* to use the bathroom with two small children. There I was in all my glory, doing my business while my 3 yr old was drying my hair (btw my hair wasn't wet) and my 1 yr old was hanging on my leg.    It was definitely a site. To be a fly on the wall (maybe not).  As I was telling my girlfriend the look on her face was priceless.  She was laughing so hard by the time this portion of our conversation was over.  I thought she was going to choke on her food.  Some might ask why not leave the door open and have the kids nearby entertained with something...And I would say, you don't know our 3 yr old.  I have tried.  Put Miss K in crib, Little Man right by the door with some toys.  Yeah, that lasted a whole second before I was running down the hall, pants hanging down trying to figure out what he was getting into.....

And that would be peanut butter, all over the counter, floor, cabinets literally in a matter of minutes.

Needless to say, as mothers, we both agreed that this will never change no matter how old they get.  There will always be a knock on the door, a pick of the lock (this is a whole other post), a MOMMMMMMMMM, to interrupt that 2 minutes of private time that we strive to get every now and again.  (And why don't they do this to Dad?)

Nobody told me this was part of the deal.  What did I sign up for?

**Oh and that Macaroni & Cheese Pizza was at Johns Incredible Pizza a new *family fun center* not too far from our house. They have any type of pizza you can think of.  Seriously some were disgusting if you ask me.  Roasted Peanut Butter Pizza? Of course the Mac N Cheese which was a hit with Little Man.  And several more but for some reason the names are escaping me.  I think I am purposely blocking them out.

Ok, so there you have it...The scoop on poop in our house.  I am sure now you can sleep better.

I am out.  I have to go to the bathroom.

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  1. I *Usually* manage to make it to the bathroom on my own the shower is another story.

    No one needs the bathroom until I get in the shower. Then, it becomes grand central station. Every. Time.

  2. Don't miss those days at all!

    Mac and cheese pizza - never heard of it but it somehow sounds divine :)


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