Thursday, July 28, 2011

Banning Children? What Next?

Did you see the latest *ban on children* article over here?

Seriously?  I get that there are certain places that small or older unbehaved children should not be. I think as a parent we should be conscious to this as well as courteous to others who may/may not have children at all or with them at the moment at these particular places.

However, whats next? 

Maybe we, all people with young children who sometimes act like children and throw tantrums regardless of what we say/do, should go live on an island?  We could have our own village to raise the children to be more behaved.  Do we have leprosy or something because we have children and sometimes they act out in public?  Remember, the leper colonies where people with the disease were quarantined?  Yah, we can have one of those!  Ha!  There isn't an island *BIG* enough to create a colony for all families with small children who misbehave.

Seriously!  I have children.  I have 4 children to be exact, 19, 12, 4, & 15 months. My small children misbehave sometimes.  If I had to put my finger on it, they probably misbehave more often than not BUT they are children.  That is what they do.  They push boundaries, they push buttons, they test you.  They sometimes scream, holler, bite, kick, roll around on the ground, I could go on.  Sometimes they do this at the most inopportune times and yes, it is embarrassing and I am apologetic to others that are being disturbed (at times) but typically I as a parent will not take my children into places that I know are not family friendly.  I have even left places quick like after realizing it is not family friendly.  I just did this while we were in Sunriver a few weeks back. 

I do not take my small children

......to movies unless it is a children's movie. 
......to unfamily friendly restaurants. 
..... to spas where people are trying to relax. 
..... to that quaint little coffee shop on the corner on Sunday morning while it is mostly adults reading the paper relaxing with their cup of joe. 
..... to the opera. 

We don't go to yoga on Wednesdays.


And I do not fly them first class.  Although if I did, I am paying the astronomical amount of money for the first class one would think I have every right to be there as much as those without children.  But I don't. 

Heck, I don't even take them to the library yet UNLESS there is a children's activity going on.

I think rather than *banning* people with families or small children, parents just need to be more conscious to the environments that they are taking their children into.  And because my small children throw tantrums, often, does not mean I lack in parenting skills, that I am a bad parent or disrespecting others.  It simply means, they are being kids.  Again, that is what children do (often) even for those parents that have gone through super nanny boot camp.  If we never take our children out in the public out of fear of them throwing a fit, having a meltdown, whatever you want to call it, parents would NEVER go out.  And if we don't ever take them out of the house into unfamiliar places, less family friendly places, how will they ever learn what is appropriate or inappropriate behavior? 

Furthermore, this mom sometimes needs to eat somewhere other than a restaurant with a play land.  This mom sometimes needs to go to the grocery store, run some errands with small children, maybe even when it is around nap time.  And then it happens at the grocery store, in line at the post office or pharmacy.  The inevitable meltdown.  Da-da-dahn!

No disrespect for those without children , I get that you want to go to a quiet place and enjoy your childless time. Relax in the pool at the resort without a 4 year old splashing you with water.  Eat your dinner without a *brat* screaming for more milk at the table next to you.  I want/need that too that is why when I don't have my children, I am not going to Applebees, Cracker Barrel, the mall, etc.  No children vacations, ahh, all inclusive adult resort here I come.  I am definitely not going to Disneyworld.

But lets put this in another perspective...Again no disrespect for those without children by nature or by choice, I think there are more people with children in this world than without so therefore as a business one would think that there is more of a customer base of families with children than without.  And to say that families with children have less disposable income to spend I think is just a cop out to rationalize *banning* children at their establishments. 

Of course in the end it is the business owners choice to decide who they want to tailor their services to.  But you won't find this mom of several tantrum throwing children at your joint, buying your products, vacationing at your resort, any time soon. Just sayin.

7 comments:

  1. What place is banning children from coming into there place? This is one place I will never go to. The world is changing and not in a good way.

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  2. I recently took a flight to Toronto. There was a less-than-two year old who pretty much cried and soiled her diapers during the flight. I don't fault the child, I fault the parent for not being attentive. These types of bans aren't necessarily against kids, but against negligent parents who act as if they don't hear their kids crying. I do think banning kids is going a bit far, but something has to be done in order to prevent what we all endured on our way to Toronto. Customers who have well-behaved kids or no kids at all shouldn't suffer from someone else's bad parenting. Good post!

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  3. I think the owner should be allowed to ask a customer to leave if they are disturbing other customers. But as far as a ban that seems extreme to me

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  4. Um, wow, I'm almost speechless at the article. I was glad to see the 18,155 commments regarding the article and most people seemed to agree with you (and I) on this topic. Kids are KIDS, sure there are some parents out there that are unattentive but sometimes kids just misbehave. Ban me all you want but just remember, those kids are going to be adults one day, adults with checking accounts and memories of not being allowed at your establishment. What a joke, people are crazy!

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  5. oh my goodness, I heard about this on the radio the other day and it made me IRATE! I guess because it assumes that kids are second-class citizens and that they don't "count" until they are adults. That just makes me sick because the world wouldn't be the same without kids. It's totally discriminatory. If you substituted "females" or "black people" for "children" in the ban then people would be all up in arms. Or if you said that old people with all their coughing, grunting and whatever else are disturbing so therefore anyone over 60 can't go to certain places, it would never stand, but because it's kids they can be pushed aside without a second thought.
    Banning kids from being around adults just teaches them to never grow up and learn how to act around adults or in certain environments. I know I don't want that for my kids. My kids are VERY well behaved. In fact, we get stopped by people almost every time we're out who tell us just that. Now that doesn't mean they never have their moments (they are kids after all), but they're so well behaved because we DO go out and we use those times to teach them how to act. I hope people who don't have kids boycott these establishments to help prove a point.

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  6. Its pretty simple, bring your little rugrats if you want to. But when your little Angel starts showing their asses, its up to you to remove your child and stop ruining everyone's decent time.

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  7. I don't see why I should tolerate your kids in a public space. It was your decision to procreate, not mine. Deal with it and don't impose your lifestyle choices on others.
    And if your children can't behave properly, keep them in a cage. Seriously. No one wants to listen to them screaming and babbling.

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